he will take care of me, he will smell like the sea

i have the best husband ever.

i also have the best blog friends in the world. the comments and emails were very much needed and i appreciate them a lot.

i can't say i feel a lot better today.

but i did eat better. i did not have a peanut butter milkshake from sonic even though i drove by it on my way home from work at 930pm.

i'll take any small victory today.

laughing out loud while she's crying inside

I heart Nickel Creek. The show last night was awesome.

The first thing worth mentioning is that I ran into my very first friend ever. Jenifer and I met at the waterfountain on the first day of kindergarden. She's my Jen. And she rocks. Not only does she read my blog every day (we all know that makes her cool), she also hooked Nathan up with the local reporter and several of Nate's comments made the front-page Nickelcreek interview in the Ashland Daily Independent.


I followed directions and didn't take any pictures. I wasn't taking any chances getting kicked out. So these pictures are also via the Independent.


An introduction to Nickel Creek. Chris plays mandolin. My Sister-In-Law Leah insists that Nathan looks like Chris. I mean, they both play the mandolin, have similar spotted ties, and are hot. I buy it. (Nathan doesn't make funny faces when playing his mandolin, though.)


Sara plays fiddle. I think she is incredibly cute. She was also wearing awesome red shoes.



I'm not sure why there isn't a pic of Sean playing the guitar, but here's the whole band. We were in the 9th row or so.

They played all the stuff I really had to hear. I think we're going to make plans to see them again in August, and again later in the year. I am really excited. You need to check them out.

That being said, I'm really depressed today. I don't know that I'm able to put it into words just yet. It's a combination of the following:

a) I absolutely hate the way I look. We spent a lot of time today looking at Nate's brother's wedding pictures, and it was really hard to look at myself.

b) I am not a mom. Most of the time, I am okay with that. (For those of you who haven't read my old blogs, our lack of child is not for lack of effort.) Most of the time I can have perspective and think about God's plan for my life and not my own. But then I hold babies over the weekend. And then we talk about our friends who are having babies. And then, in my head, it goes back to the fat thing, and I get in a cycle of thinking that my fatness contributes, maybe even causes, the lack of a baby.

c) I have absolutely no idea where we will be and when the move will happen. I just want to be in a different place. Geographically. Spritually. Mentally. Size of clothing-ly.

So what did I have for dinner? A peanut butter milkshake from Sonic. Yeah, that fixes things.

so wholly your devotee

Today was another difficult day at work. I spent most of the afternoon sitting in family court. It was really depressing. Teenagers have really changed since I was one. Teenage girls getting in a fight in the courtroom. Shameful.

Onto better news, dinner was great today! Cajun tilapia and sweet potatoes from the grill. Nathan is the grill master! That almost makes up for the Waffle House lunch... (I know! I am ashamed!!)

We are once again going out of town this weekend. We are going to our hometown ("home home" as I call it) to see Nickel Creek! I think we have pretty good seats. The concert is at the Paramount, which you Billy Ray Cyrus fans will know as the background to the "Achy Breaky Heart" video. Did I really just admit that Billy Ray and I share a common county or origin? Yes, yes I did.

I've spent too much time playing around on the internet tonight, so I must pack for the weekend and finish straightening the house up a smidge. However, I did learn 2 important things from unclutterer.com.

1. If you have tupperware that is holding on to food odors, crumple up a sheet of newspaper, place it inside, and seal it up. Overnight, the newspaper will absorb the odors.
2. Vinegar in a spray bottle is effective weed killer.

Have a great weekend!

where oh where are you tonight?

I am so sorry that I have been Missing In Action. Things have gotten crazy. In a good way.


I love my job. While I'm learning the ropes, it's taking me longer to get things done. I have such an opportunity to facilitate change in the lives of kids. This is so exciting. However, I worked a 12 hour day Monday and 10 yesterday, making today's 8 feel like a breeze. I now have 6 hours to spend away from work, but I don't know when I'll have the time to do that. But I am not resentful at all.


I feel like most of my time away from work is being spent keeping the house in shape to show. It's hard work selling a house. Keeping all the cat hair up, keeping the dishes washed, the showers and tub and sinks clean. I mean, we're not filthy people typically, but clean and shiny all the time is hard work.


We had a blast at the wedding this weekend. The couple is just georgeous.





We love you Vanessa and Brad!!


Nathan and I really enjoyed Washington Courthouse. Not only was the wedding hall easy to find, we also had tons of shopping at our disposal. Nathan enjoyed the Mandolin Store. They gave him a free pick. We also enjoyed the Prime Outlet Stores. It was hard to be good in the Pottery Barn Outlet, but I'm planning a trip back when we get our new house!


I have nothing to say about being healthy. Only that it's not going well. I had pizzabread from Giovanni's tonight. (You Kentucky-Ohio-West Virginia girls know what I'm talking about! It's the Italian Place to Be!)


I hope to get back into regular posting. But tonight I've got laundry to put away.


And I haven't forgotten about those of you who are getting books...I promise they will go out in the near future. It will just be a surprise when you get them!

this is all a game

Well, I am exhausted.

I'm having a hard time adding an hour commute each way to work and back. But I am having time to listen to great sermons.

I'm currently listening to a series about the roles of the Holy Spirit from Southland Christian Church. It's a church that Nathan and I used to go to, and we have some friends who still do. I get the podcasts from iTunes and really enjoy them. Anywho, the sermon and a half I listened to today spoke of how Jesus takes the following roles in our lives:

• Counselor - always there, always listening, always guiding. Hover, His voice is not loud. We can get distracted by noise and not hear Him. What is noise in my life? Food, tv, spending money. I need to pare back. And that's what I'm trying to do.
• Gardener - I really liked this imagery. We are in the process of being pruned, being refined, and sometimes we are pruned to a point of looking scraggly and thin in order to grow full and strong. We have to allow God time to transform us, just like our plants don't become beautiful overnight.
• Attorney - When we are living in sin, the Holy Spirit has the role of persecutor to bring us to our honest selves through conviction. But as we are forgiven and work toward a holy life, Jesus becomes our defense attorney, as he paid our price and provided our pardon.
• Surgeon - God took the broken pieces of my life and put me back together. Not with a magic wand that was clean and pretty and immediate. But like a surgeon, He continues to dig around in me and change me by taking out the bad stuff and sewing me back up. Great imagery.
• I still have Scout, Postman, and River to listen to. All in all, good stuff.

I ate pretty well today. Starbucks and banana for breakfast. Apple and spinach salad for lunch. Black bean burger, corn, and Jell-o for dinner. I really wanted ice cream, but Nate didn't want to go. Thanks Nate!

You probably won't hear from me again until Sunday or Monday. We're headed to Washington Courthouse, Ohio for my friend Vanessa's wedding. I'm sure I'll have pics when we get back. I'm really hoping that over the weekend someone will come and look at the house. We're working hard enough to keep it clean and show-worthy! And when I get back, I'll start getting BookCrossing books out. Remember, if you want a book, email me your address!!

Still no exercise. And I watched some tv. But Grey's Anatomy is on and I'm not watching!

Have a great weekend!

beneath the sheets of paper lies my truth

Wow. I knew I'd been busy, but I didn't know I'd gone 2 days without posting. Geez.

Things have been really busy. We've officially got our house on the market. That's really scary. We don't know what we'll get out of it, and that will determine what we are able to afford when we move. It's discouraging to me that we've put all this work into the house and we're not going to see the financial gain we'd expected. Or I guess just that we'd hoped for.

And how have I coped with this? Eating and tv. Groan.

Eating has been terrible. We had Taco Bell for dinner last night. (Although for lunch the last 2 days I had the tomato and mozzarella salad from Panera and it's amazing.) I am trying so hard to be back on track. So hard. This morning was Starbucks and banana. Lunch will be black bean burgers, and hopefully fish or shrimp for dinner. I am trying to focus on my eating. Focus on better eating.

Yeah, and we've been watching a lot of Seinfeld. And last night I watched the rerun of Oprah. It was the first installment of the Life Your Best Life Diet. Bob Green kept telling them (and me) that we need to figure out why we are fat before we can expect to change it. He said that when we say things like, "I like food" or "I'm just lazy" we are just lying to ourselves. So that's my job for today. Why am I fat? I am a therapist. I can figure this out.

I have been listening to sermons on my way home though. That's been good for me. Monday's was about marriage and how we approach marriage and how we involve God in our marriages are the ways to make it work. I guess I take for granted that I have a strong marriage. I have never even thought that divorce could ever be an option. That's almost laughable to me. I guess I don't think about the people that don't have a connection to God and how that impacts their connection to a spouse. It was fascinating to me.

The sermon yesterday talked about secrets, referencing postsecret. He spoke of how keeping secrets is detrimental and involves lying to others, ourselves, and God. I really liked it.

(By the way, if you ever want a sermon that I reference, feel free to contact me and I'll tell you which podcast it's from. All the sermons I download are available through iTunes.)

Today is going to be a great day. Independence Day. I am going to try very hard to do things in a mindful way today, thinking of how I am freeing myself of things and of baggage and of whatever it is that is keeping me fat. Wish me luck.

Have a great Independence Day if you're American, and just have a great day if you are something else!

a lobster man's wife

Happy July!

(For those of you who are participating in my "Get a BookCrossing Book!" giveaway, my name on BookCrossing.com is NateAndKrissie so I can be listed as referring you!)

Token Fat Girl has a very inspiring post today. She talks about how cleansing it can be to start a new month. She has great goals for the month of July. I listed a few goals a few weeks ago, and I'm going to amend them and list some more!

1. No television in my own home.
2. Very limited meat.
3. I will listen to sermons on my commute home from work.
4. I will weigh myself only on Mondays.
5. I will log everything I eat on FitDay.
6. Of the 5 work days in a week, I will bring my lunch on 4 of them.
7. For everything I buy, I will get rid of 2 similar things.
8. I will do some sort of exercise 3 times a week.

What are your goals for July? We can do anything for a month! And we'll create healthy habits along the way!

Remember - visit my previous post, leave a comment, and email me your mailing address (questionsfordessert at gmail dot com) to get free books!